Friday, August 24, 2007

Detox

Dear Blog,

A couple posts ago I talked about how much I looooooved pilates, and I still do, don't get me wrong, but today I was a traitor and I went to yoga with work BFF Jaimi. Jaimi is in such good shape it's insane in the membrane and when she told me that she only does yoga, I was like "sign me up!" So today I went with her and y'all, yoga is hard. For reals! I consider myself to be in shape, you know, running marathons and being advanced in the pilates but this was IN to the TENSE. Not only were the moves strenuous thanks to us going to an ADVANCED CLASS, (THANKS JAIMI FOR WATCHING OUT FOR YOUR GIRL...) but, they turn on the heater or something so it's like 100 degrees and extra humid in there. I know I exaagerate in the blogs, but this is NO exaageration. I felt like I was experiencing Dante's Inferno, doing these crazy poses and sweating like a beast.

So I'm in there getting my zen on and Jaimi's telling me I'm doing all good and I'm really proud of myself! Our Yogi is telling me that I'm really going to detox and get all of the toxins out of my system and if I'm tasting a grody taste in my mouth then those are the toxins being released. I'm like, wow, this is really starting to pay off because I was tasting some grodiness in my mouth. Well then, all of my fellow class takers started looking at me REALLY STRANGE and I'm like, HELLO I'M TOTALLY ZENNING OVER HERE. I figured they were jealous of my hot moves.

Then class was over and I drove home and I looked in the mirror.

This is what I saw.



Apparently, I'm toxic.

xoxo,
Alison

9 comments:

Tony Ritz said...

HA! What's funny is my tongue does that whenever I pop the chewable Pepto Bismol tablets for my upset tummy. My tongue and spit turns black. Does this mean I'm toxic as well?

Faris said...

That's hilarious. I really hope your tongue didn't look like that after yoga. I might wonder about that class. Love the crazy eyes.

prof said...

i think we need an exorcism. the other day her head turned all the way around too. i just hope she doesn't projectile vomit all over me while shouting redrum redrum redrum.

*jcg said...

i need more explanation. seriously this did not happen.

Drew said...

omg!! gross! i was reading the blog and the picture was cut off at the bottom of the screen, and when i scrolled down i actually jumped! that pic is disturbing. umm my toxins did NOT look like that after i did yoga.

prof said...

i am telling you, we need an exorcism!!! for the love of golly gee moses i need a full night's sleep.

Drew said...

amen, prof. that picture is demonic.

Emily said...

That picture was worth the wait! I think I would die if my tongue looked like that. How did you fix it? No yoga for me!

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